work in progres

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Wipe

So tonight I’m working on my “White Shirt” painting. I spend a good hour on the most detailed part of the piece—the hangar hook and its shadow. I do a really nice job, with small brushes, getting each curve and the flash of metal just right. Detailed, but not too fussy. Then I step back.

I’ve made an error. The hook is too small. It looks almost right, but not quite.

I sit for a minute, then take a rag dipped in turps and wipe it off the painting. You need to be willing to do that sometimes, just as an author needs to be able to delete a wondrous chapter that just doesn’t work with the rest of the novel. If it’s not right, it has to go, no matter how much you like it.

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I hesitate to post this. The image depends on very subtle gradations of value, and those are not captured very well by my camera (with my limited photographic skills at least). Many of the value changes are much harsher in this image than on the actual painting. But here it is.

“Bag and Bulb,” oil on lead-primed canvas, 16 × 20”.

Bag and Bulb

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There is a slang term used in the U.S. (usually by women): “the fuglies.” It refers to days or weeks when everything seems wrong with your appearance and you just can’t manage to look the way you want to. The term is also sometimes used to insult someone you find unpleasant to look at. The word’s etymology is profane.

In my experience, just about every painting goes through one or more fugly stages. There is a point where the painting, at least to the artist, is hideous and seems unredeemable. There is no point to continuing, because the painting is doomed. I’d post more work in progress shots, but the fuglies really bother me.

Unless you are prepared for the fuglies, they will destroy your ability to finish any painting. It takes a leap of faith to look at a work in progress, be revolted by what it looks like now, and believe that it has potential nonetheless. You have to believe that you can make it look right, even though right now you can’t stand to be in the same room with the thing. The more you’ve done it, and the more you can remind yourself that you’ve been able to get through this before, the easier it gets.

If you’re a beginner, it’s even worse. You may not yet have made a painting that looked anything like what you wanted it to, so it’s hard to keep working on what feels like a piece of junk from start to finish. That’s a leap of faith as well—faith in the idea that even if this painting is ugly, the next one will be less so. Take my word for it: if you keep at it, your work will get better.

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